learntoquestion ltq discussions

To be malleable is to be easily influenced by something and/or someone. When it comes to the question, “ Is our identity really malleable?” I believe that the answer is sometimes, and it depends on the person. For a lot of people, they want to be liked by their peers, and so they tend to adjust their identity to fit other people's expectations, but other people may be very confident and proud of who they are and aren’t willing to change their identities.

Society significantly limits our ability to change and grow throughout our lives, but it can be different for everyone. In one of my peers' identity vessels, on the outside were words such as sad, quiet, and more along those lines. Now, many people may have different reactions to this. Some may see this and decide that they want to seem happier, and do things that would stimulate their self-esteem to achieve their goal of being more content. Now, for other people, their reactions might be different. For others, they might assume that everyone sees them as a sad person, and this could essentially decrease self-esteem and make them worry about what others think of them. Society can also “water” down our personalities and make us seem like we are “too much”. An example of this is from a poem called “Identity” by Julio Noboa Pollanco, which says,” Let them be as flowers, always watered, fed, guarded, admired, but harnessed to a pot of dirt. I'd rather be a tall, ugly weed, clinging on cliffs, like an eagle wind-wavering above high, jagged rocks.”. To me, this means that society makes us feel like we have to change who we are and essentially suppress our identities just because they don't match the standard. Being a tall, ugly weed means that you don’t care to meet society standards. You are able to be yourself, and not change who you are just because someone says that you're too angry, or you have too much energy. At the end of the day, this is what makes you you, and yes, some changes can be good if they contribute to the development of your character, but it is only beneficial if you are changing because you want to.

Our identity is built up in a process, which makes it malleable to an extent. Unfortunately, in an age of social media, the concept of forgetting is gone, which ultimately leads to positive or negative narratives being formed with little in the way of change following such buildup of opinions about others and ourselves. In an article written by Nausicaa Renner, she talks about how in the past, our lives were lived with less documentation, examination, and public interference. However, in today’s world, children especially, have a tendency to document and record their lives. As media historian Kate Eichhorn writes that this tendency brings with it both positives and negatives. On the positive side children have an unprecedented amount of freedom that had never been possible in the past, but on the other hand it could have a profoundly negative, or positive, effect on the development of children. The result of this documenting is that it limits how we are perceived to how we behave online. Because social media is so reductive, people have a preconceived notion about you based on social media behavior alone, which can ultimately make changing and growing–in the eyes of other people–impossible, or at the very least, much harder than it was before modern times. This is also potentially rooted in psychology as well as evidenced by the Fundamental Attribution Error or FAE, which states that people often attribute poor actions as a personality trait rather than an isolated incident. To give an example on the role of social media in this, say someone sees you like a post on instagram. Now they might think that you wholeheartedly support this post, which disregards your true intentions and simply attributes you as a supporter regardless of whether or not you explicitly said so. In addition to this, there are a plethora of other examples that show how activity online and in the modern world affect others perceptions of ourselves. Ultimately, it makes our identity both extremely malleable to the point that our identity could be entirely fake online, but it can also become so irreversibly changed to the point where it is impossible to change. The reason it is impossible to change once it has gotten to this “Point of no Return” is also potentially rooted in psychology. Groupthink is a very dangerous process that can arise due to lack of knowledge, need to fit in, or ignorance to a given situation. In the case of social media, one person can see something mildly condemning online of another and subsequently tell all of their friends who build a narrative surrounding this person, with each person adding to the building opinion about this other. This is an echochamber, and whether good or bad, it still builds untrue narratives, which can hinder growth of identity. With this knowledge of echochambers, groupthink, and FAE, we know that social media and the modern world is a breeding ground for others building untrue and harmful beliefs about a given person, subconsciously or otherwise. Unfortunately, these fallacies make it a Herculean task to overcome narratives and truly grow past them. Accepting the growth of a person is hard when all you know of them is what someone told the friend of your friend, who then told you. In this modern age, our actions are boiled down and concentrated in the minds of others and stood up on shaky foundations of assumptions and half-truths, which makes it so much harder to accept the change of one of your peers.

Our environment, the people around us, upbringing, social interactions, and many more factors shape how we see ourselves and others, and how they see us. A lot of the time, we feel the need to change aspects of ourselves to fit in with others, something that is not necessarily beneficial. Most people have felt the need to fit in with the majority throughout their lives, often by altering appearances or rejecting true beliefs. Surrounded by people who disagree with you, you don’t want to be the odd one out, so you often adapt to the environment around you. In some cases, this could protect you, but it mostly weakens self identity and creates dissonance. Personal identities, values, and beliefs help guide us towards choices and decisions that align with our ideas. For example, you often surround yourself with those who share similar beliefs and hobbies as you. In Nausicaa Renner’s “How Social Media Shapes Our Identity”, she mentions how the “internet is more permanent, and more pervasive, it’s hard to avoid the relics of past identities”. This connects to the fact that although people’s identities on social media seem very fixated and connected to that person, it is often just surface level material. In the age of technology and social media, what you put out there is what people will always be able to see and what can resurface later on. One of the more negative aspects of social media is that posts that were shared in the past by people could also be something that does not reflect their present identity anymore. It is almost impossible to completely separate yourself from the past on social media. While I was walking through the gallery of students’ identity vessels, I noticed that many people included images of themselves and their friends. Many of these pictures were on the outside of the vessel, further emphasizing the fact that these little instances of their lives are only the surface level aspect of their identity. With these vessels, the accompanying statements brought attention to the fact that many people have a preconceived notion of what a specific person is like based on their social media and images that they shared. However, in these statements they stated that there was a lot more to their identity than these pictures. I think this is a very important thing to keep in mind before making assumptions about others.

I believe that social norms play a role in how we see ourselves, how others see us, and how we see others. I think that a large amount of our identity comes from society’s idea of what is socially acceptable. Looking at social media, I see people conforming to a popular opinion whether that be political or even something as little as a food preference. When an unpopular opinion comes out, I expect to see backlash even if it is done in a respectful manner, opening my eyes to see how even sharing opinions can lead to wanting to hide their identity. I myself am a victim to this, as I tend to hide some traits I consider “nerdy” or “weird” from my friends and classmates. I believe that Naussica Renner’s How Social Media Shapes Our Identity captures this idea the best with the quote “smartphone—allows us to produce a narrative of our lives, to choose what to remember and what to contribute to our own mythos.” Seeing some of the identity vessels surprised me, as I saw some of those people as their social media presence. Learning about their hobbies and interests allowed me to see people in a different light, contrary to how their social media may portray them. Our individual identities may impact our personal choices on a level such as choosing a hobby or a career and our social identities can relate to friend groups we join and communities we feel we relate to. Sometimes, pressure can force people into groups they don’t genuinely relate to and can oftentimes limit the truth. Taking a look at some of the vessels and looking inside made me question this. Why didn’t their vessel match up with the representation I had of them in my head? I attributed this to social media's impact on identity and what people show on the outside. People choose what to showcase what they deem acceptable on their social media, which takes away any individuality or uniqueness that could differentiate someone. Someone I thought to categorize in a certain way was totally different to what their interests and identity told me. While personal and social identity have overlap in that they represent someone, they differ sometimes in their truthfulness. Personal identity represents what you truly believe in or like, while social identity can be a facade that is preformative to who you surround yourself with.

Identity is shaped by many many things. Throughout this project, we explored how activities, environment, family, friends, school, and more, play a role in one's personal identity. I believe the environment and parents have the biggest influence on people. My experience in life in general, has been people have been looking into their parents minds. They reflect and spit out ideas that had already been expressed to them. Both in ideologies (morals), and in mannerisms (actions). One thing I found lacking from the majority of each identity vessel is family. Although some included pictures, it was not a forefront which contradicts my own personal life experiences. This is not to say that every single person's reflection lacked depth, but rather, raises the question of how accurately can we depict ourselves? Which depiction is more accurate, societal view or personal view? Given the amount of pure layers to this assignment, I really enjoyed completing it. There was so much room for creativity and I was very intrigued by the interpretations of identity in society.

How others perceive us is based on what we share out to the world. The second article by Nausicaa Renner says “New technology—especially the smartphone—allows us to produce a narrative of our lives, to choose what to remember and what to contribute to our

own mythos”. We spend so much time online curating how we want our followers to see us and for a lot of first impressions they are based on a social media account. People’s thoughts about others are often based on that first impression that they get when first meeting somebody, and it can be hard to escape that first impression. How we see ourselves is also not free from how we are perceived socially. For some people, they shape their own identity on how they want to be seen by others. I think that we always have the chance to change our personal identities, but it is harder to change how other people perceive us. Society as a whole limits our ability to change and grow by dictating what we should be doing by what age. So it can be hard to break free from societal expectations placed upon ourselves because oftentimes we internalize those societal expectations and they become a part of our identity. Part of the social identity theory is that a person’s sense of self is derived from group memberships. I think this applies here because a lot of what I put in my vessel was group memberships, like my ethnicity and race, as well as activities I do and clubs I am a part of. Looking through other people’s identity vessels was an eye opening experience. I’ve seen some of the people in my class before or I’ve talked to them briefly, but seeing how they see themselves gave me greater insight about them. I learned about the interests my classmates had and some of them that I shared with them. It was also nice to see how people chose to decorate their vessels with unique items and pictures. I think that our identities can become more malleable to change, if we as a society become more accepting of people’s growth and change over time and stop limiting ourselves to that first impression of them.

To look beyond is to look within. When we meet people, the first thing we see is their physical appearance: how they dress, how they hold themselves, and how they act. These qualities can only tell us so much about a person; sometimes, you can tell that they play sports or that they like music. You must ask yourself, is that who they truly are as a person? It is not until you look beyond someone's physical appearance and have a meaningful conversation that you can truly see someone for who they are.

More importantly than perceiving others is perceiving yourself. If the most important opinion someone has on you isn't your own, then there is something wrong. No one is you, and you are no one else; so why should you be comparing yourself to others and caring about what others think of you? You set goals for yourself and base how you see yourself on the goals and ideas that are yours, not those of others. When you fail to achieve your own goal, the only pressure to do better is created by yourself. So how you see yourself is not based on anything other than what you truly believe it to be. However, when you get lost in your own world, you must seek assistance from those closest to you, as the help of others is always stronger than you on your own. Being able to see yourself based on only your own thoughts and those closest to you will give you the healthiest and strongest mind.

To make strong connections, you must present yourself in a way that makes people feel comfortable and happy. How others perceive you, though not affecting directly how you see yourself, is vitally important for building long-lasting friendships. Be the person that you would want to attract. I'm not saying not to be yourself, but how you hold yourself and how you act determines the type of people who will want to be around you. So if you want to be around nice people, then others need to see you as a nice person. Always stay true to yourself and your values, because those are the things that others will see in you.

That is what shapes how we see others, how we see ourselves, how others see us.